TSQ: Legend Of The Boneknapper
by PKWolf014
Summary: After Gobber's home is set on fire, he claims it is the work of the Boneknapper, a, "Foul beast." Insisting this is the last time the dragon will bother him, he goes on a quest to slay it. Dragging the riders unwillingly with him. AU Female Hiccup (Haedryin) Male Astrid, (Asher)


**A/N: In my head, this takes place a little after Haedryin was shot in 'Gone Gustav Gone.' Yeah... Um :) I will update (Hopefully) RTTE Soonly.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing but Haedryin!**

* * *

The stars are shining merrily down on the isle of Berk. It is a peaceful night and it seems as if nothing can go wrong…..

"FIRE!"

I watch as the fire licks at the wood happily, burning Gobbers home. Hookfang and Snotlout dump a water trough on it before pulling up. "The wind is shifting! Fire brigade move in!" Dad yells from the ground. I grip Toothless's saddle handles tighter and Asher and Stormfly fly over the shop and pour water on it. "Bring the Nadder's in from the south!" Dad yells. Asher pulls away from the building.

"I'm on it!" He yells.

Fishlegs and Meatlug fly over the roof and dump more water it. The fire hisses and I watch it as Dad yells out to her, "Gronckles! Aim for the roof!"

Toothless swoops down and I lean down over the saddle and hold out my hand the fire freezes in place and the embers hiss and die. I straighten and Toothless flies over and before he lands, I jump off of him and rush over to my dad. "Where's Gobber? Is he still inside?" I demand and stare at the frozen building.

Dad stares ahead at it, "No, we can't find him." He says.

"I'm right here." Gobber says. I snap my head around and watch as he walks out of the forge pushing a cart. "That beast will pay for this." Gobber says. Dad looks ahead and Gobber limps to us.

"Gobber what happened?" He asks. Gobber walks darwrof.

"What does it look like? A dragon set my home on fire." Gobber says. I groan softly putting my head in my hands. The dragons hadn't intentionally set anything on fire for three years.

This was just supposed to be a nice stay at Berk away from Dragons Edge, and it is certainly not ending up to be that? Thank you Gobber.

"What?" Asher demands as Gobber stops lifting his hook into the air.

"You've pushed me to far you ugly bag of bones." Gobber yells into the sky and absolutely nothing. I look at him before I look up at dad.

"Dad, what's he talking about? Our dragons don't do that anymore." I say, "They haven't done that in years."

Dad sighs, "Oh, he dosen't mean one of your dragons, Iyn." He assures and looks up at Gobber, "Gobber for the last time there is no such thing as the-" Dad starts as Gobber finishes it.

"Boneknapper?"

All the adults, and I as one let out a sigh, Tuffnut laughs uneasily, "The what-knapper?" He asks. Gobber turns to look at him, and I groan.

"Oh please dont he him started-" I beg before Gobber talks over me. I've heard this story so many times it physically hurts.

"A disgusting foul beast wearing a coat of stolen bones, like a giant flying skeleton." Gobber explains. Fishlegs perks up and grins at us.

"The Dragon Manual says that the Boneknapper will stop at nothing to find the perfect bone for it's armor….It's awesome." Fishlegs says her eyes wide.

Dad laughs, "Come on! It's a myth! It doesn't even exist!"

I look at him, "Isn't that what a myth is? Something that doesn't exist?" I ask. Dad looks at me with an annoyed expression and I shrug before Gobber whirls around and points his hook and dad.

"Im telling you it's real! I've been running from him my whole life. He's the one who started this fire." Gobber says and wave out his hand dramatically staring up at the sky. No, no it is not. Even studying dragons for three years I have never once come across the Boneknapper once.

My uncle, Spitelout walks up to dad, "Stoick, we found Gobber's underpants hanging from the stove, they must have started the fire." He says. The crowd laughs and dad takes the stick with Gobber's smoking underpants hanging from them and looks at Gobber.

"Still think it's the Boneknapper? Or just your underpants?" dad asks. I roll my eyes slightly and put a hand on my hip.

"I don't think! I know! Somehow this dragon has found me again! I'm telling you this dragon is pure evil." Gobber insists.

Dad sighs, "Gobber it's late and we're too tired for your stories. Get some rest." Dad commands. Gobber looks up at him and glares before he rips the underpants from his hand and shoves it into his cart.

"You rest. I'm putting an end to this." Gobber says and looks at his sheep, "Come on, Phil." he commands and the sheep baa's before walking off after him. "Let's go. We didn't need their help anyway." He adds.

The Vikings around me start to walk home and I stare at Gobber's retreating back. I sigh and look at Toothless, "We can't let him go by himself." I say and look back at the other teens whose eyes except Snotlout's we're wide with excitement. "Alright VIkings, grab your shields." I say.

Tuffnut and Ruffnut high five Asher fist pumps and Fishlegs shakes her hand in the air whooping. I stare at Snotlout and she looks at me, she puts a hand on her hip and looks at me, "This is a break from battles, besides there is no way I'm getting on a boat to go after a fake dragon." She says.

…..

"Push! Put your backs into it!" Gobber yells from the front of the ship. I pull the oar back and my shoulders ache from doing so for hours on end, "Come on you lazy dogs! Stroke! Stroke!" Gobber yells "encouragingly". "You aren't even trying." He adds. I look at him and frown as I bite down on my lip and pull the oar back again. I look back at Snotlout.

"How fun is this, right? Way better than dealing with Dagur right?" I ask rubbing my blistered palms with my fingers, and stare her in the eyes, "This is pretty great."

Snotlout rolls her eyes. "Yup. Nothing better than rowing until your hands bleed." She agrees. I grab the oars with both hands and start to row again.

"I just want you kids to know it touches my heart, you helping me slay the Boneknapper. True Vikings you are." He says and looks at us, sniffing.

"Gobber? Are we there yet?" Ruffnut asks and huffs as she pulls on the oar again.

"Oh you'll know we're close when you're ears explode from the piercing screams. Legend says this dragon's roar is so fierce it can melt the flesh right off your bones!" Fishlegs says and waves a hand in front of her face in a clawing motion.

"Not so Fishlegs." Gobber says and I snap my head up to look at him, "The Boneknapper has no roar at all. That's why he's so terrifying he's a silent killer." Gobber says and stares at us as if daring us to disagree.

"Wait. So if we don't hear anything….We're dead?" Ruffnut asks. We all stop rowing, listening.

"I don't hear anything." Tuffnut hisses. I bite my lip listening, ignoring Tuffnut. Phil baa's and we all jump and I watch small snowflakes fall to the deck. Gobber laughs.

"Good one, Phil." He says and laughs again before he looks at us, his face completely serious. "Did I ever tell you about the first time I met the dreaded Boneknapper? I was a young lad, about your age. On summer vacation with my family, when I heard the call of nature. I saw an army of Vikings frozen in battle! Clutched in the fingers of one the Vikings was a small treasure chest. I had to have it. I reached in and pulled out the chest. It was the most beautiful thing I ever saw. But the frozen Viking was alive! He started punching me in the face punching out my tooth. After he was done he started pointing a behind me, so I looked. And there it was, I never even heard it coming. The Boneknapper! It crashed into the glacier causing an avalanche of frozen Vikings! I ran for my life, trying to escape the avalanche and that old bag of bones, but I slid on the ice and nearly lost the treasure in the water. I managed to grab it when I reached into water...only to find the frozen Viking punching me in the face again! Then suddenly the Boneknapper landed on the ice I was sitting on and the force alone sent my flying with the treasure chest. I managed to hang onto it. The Boneknapper wanted that treasure, but I wanted it more so when he grabbed me and the treasure chest I managed to get free and soar through a hole in a glacier that he crashed into. I slid on ice and landed safely on my parents ship and that's how this whole mess started." Gobber says and laughs happily.

"You expect us to believe a frozen Viking punched you in the face?" Snotlout demands. I rub my hands and look up at Gobber.

"Yeah….twice." Gobber says and holds up two fingers. I look around at the other teens.

"Hey, it could happen." I say. Asher rolls his eyes and shakes his head and Gobber walks forward.

"What do you mean,"it could happen"? It did! But I outsmarted the silent beast." Gobber says and points to himself for good measure.

"Um Gobber,….I hate to be a stickler for details but…Boneknapper's are not silent." Fishlegs says. Gobber sigh and rolls his eyes.

"Fishlegs! I know what I didn't hear! But I could feel it…" Gobber starts. I look up at him waiting for him to continue his dramatic sentence, and he picks up again, "I had a sixth sense for danger. I can smell anything taste the oncoming doom…." Gobber starts to boast about himself with the boat crashes onto something.

I'm thrown off of my seat and land on the deck with an oof. I grab the edge of the chest and Asher looks at me. I glance back at the huge rock behind us. Tuffnut looks over the edge, "Whoa," He says and looks back at us grinning. "Definitely better than dealing with Dagur."

"Uh..I'm tasting rocks." Asher says as he stares down at the ocean, Gobber walks forward and looks up at the sky nodding his head, "Ah. We're here." He says. I stand and walk across the sinking boat. I walk past Gobber and jump over the railing and land on the ocean.

Ice spreads under my feet and I look back at the teens and Gobber,"What are you waiting for?" I ask and wave my hand forward. The ice path spreads to the beach and Asher swings over the side of the boat and lands on the ice.

After seeing Asher's success Gobber, the twins, Snotlout and Fishlegs climb over the side of the sinking ship and onto the ice path they walk across it and I wait to make sure everyone makes it before I walk forward lifting up my hands and taking the bridge with me.

I step onto the beach and Ruffnut watches as the boat sinks into the water with a plop. "Not that Im opposed to danger at every corner but were stuck in the middle of nowhere and no one has any idea where we are." She exclaims and walks forward at us.

"Um...except the Boneknapper. Legend says.." She starts.

"Hey you know what legend also says? Stop talking." Snotlout says. Fishlegs tosses the bone she was holding to the side.

"Okay just hold on for one darn second-!" Fishlegs starts angrily. I toss a snowball to Fishlegs she catches it and tosses it at Snotlout. I walk forward and look at Gobber.

"No need to panic. I've been ship-wrecked many times." Gobber says and looks back at us actually looking happy.

I put a hand on my hip and glance Asher before looking at Gobber."Oh. Well that's comforting, besides we live on our own island Gobber."I point out and he ignores me. He sighs and sits down and picks up a rock sharpening his hook.

"Oh, you never forget your first shipwreck. I was stranded island with only my broom. It was a every small island. It's no wonder the Boneknapper found me again he never forage me for taking that treasure. He swooped down and tried to snatch me, but I dodged him just in time and then I saw it. There wass another island not to far away from me, my only escape. But I was surrounded by….bloodthirsty hammerhead sharks! I had only had one chance. So I ran across the shark-infested water and beat them back with my broom. As I ran across the water the Boneknapper tried to snatch me away in it's sharp talons I didn't think i was going to make it. But they form the depths the ocean leapt forth a giant hammerhead whale!" Gobber says.

I look at him disbelievingly."Whoa! And the hammerhead whale at the Boneknapper?" Fishlegs asks. Gobber tosses his rock to the side and looks up at her.

"Almost. But he got away." He says. I look back at Asher and roll my eyes.

"Yeah, only so he can tell another tale." I mutter and Asher snorts with laughter.

Gobber ignores me, "Years later the dragon hunted me down again and chased me into the jungle. All I had was my trusty egg beater, which I used to cut through that thick brush as fast as a jungle cat. Still, the Boneknapper was right behind me and was relentless in pursuing me! Growing desperate, I ran up the side of the volcano, and courageously only leapt across the fiery crater. Then deep within the burning lava, burst forth a giant hammerhead yak!" Gobber says and would have carried on had I not tossed a snowball in his face.

Tuffnut stares at it and Gobber wipes the snow off his face. "Okay, wait a minute. so now you're saying a giant hammerhead yak leapt out of the fiery volcano and ate the Boneknapper?" Tuffnut ask and waves his hands around.

Gobber stands and looks at him, "Ha, you would have thought so." He says and looks at us,"But the dragon got away again! I knew that scoundrel would keep coming after me so I set up a gauntlet of traps and waited for the beast. My patience paid off, for as soon as he was ready, the Boneknapper flew down from the skies and charged at me when that happened I ran like the wind but the traps failed! Then captured, I did what any brave Viking would do, I yelled for help. The gods must have heard my prayers. It was Thor! He tossed a mighty thunderbolt, then from the center of the earth blasted forth the hammerhead yak riding the hammerhead whale! They dived forward and ate the Boneknapper! As they tumbled down we saluted each other." Gobber says.

I blink in disbelief. "Wow the whale saluted you?" Fishlegs says amazed. I stare back at the girl.

"Wait? You believe him!" I demand.

"Yeah! Can you believe it!" Gobber asks ignoring me. I blink and Gobber grins, "Years later he tracked me down on Berk…" He starts.

"Are you kidding? I don't believe any of this!" Snotlout says and looks at Tuffnut he nods.

"You totally made everything up!" Tuffnut yells.

"Come on Gobber! It's time to get out of here." Ruffnut says.

"Gobber! We need to get home!" Snotlout adds. I look back at the group and Tuffnut leans forward.

"You don't even have any proof that thing exists!" Tuffnut says. Gobber stands.

"Course I do. I still have the treasure." Gobber says and lifts up the fold of his pants showing off a white T shaped bone, "The stunning belt buckle. It's was in the Viking's treasure chest. It's kept my pants up for years." Gobber says.

"Well it is stunning." Fishlegs agrees.

Asher shoves at my back and I stumble forward and look back at him he glares and folds his arms across his chest.I walk forward,"Listen, Gobber? Instead of chasing after an imaginary dragon maybe we should try to figure out how to get home." I say and Gobber lifts up his hook to my face.

"Say no more. I hear you loud and clear. I've got a plan." He says and looks at me and nods before he looks around at us, "Alright who wants to be dragonbait?" Gobber asks. I suck in a sharp breath and Gobber points his finger at Fishlegs. She gasps and stares at Phil who shuffles away.

….

"Uh! Gobber are you sure this is safe?" Fishlegs shouts from where she was standing under a ribcage on a pile of bones. Gobber measures something with his thumb before he turns around and waves his hand.

"Eh, safety's over-rated!" He calls and walks up to us. I stare at him and he looks at us.

"Okay, here the plan. The Boneknapper wants me, he comes down that trail-" Gobber says and points at a trail"-See's Fishlegs, thinks it me-" He says and points at himself. "-Rushes Fishlegs-" He says and points at her. "-Causing Phil to drop that rope-" Gobber says and points to the Phil and the ice rope I made. "-Dropping that ribcage-" He says and points up at the ribcage, and Gobber looks at us and finishes, "And we rush in and finish him off, once and for all!"

I shake my head and look up at Gobber, "This is never going to work. You are taking this way to far! You need to face it, there is no such thing as the Boneknapper!" I snap and look up at him he waves a hand and leans down signaling for us to do the same.

"Way to go Fishlegs! You're doing fine!" Gobber shouts. I lean down and look up at him.

"No wonder the entire village thinks you're crazy!" I say. "Besides I've heard this story over ten times and it keeps changing." I say and Snotlout snorts.

"Hello, he see's dead Vikings." Snotlout says.

"Yeah, especially that thing about the hammerhead yak." Tuffnut says.

Asher shake his head in annoyance, "This is a complete waste of time. We should be heading back to the Edge." He says.

I stare at Gobber,"We're going to be here for a very long time." I say and he waves a hand and stares forward and the rest of teens break into a arguement.

"GUYS!" Fishlegs shouts.

I snap my head around to her, "What?" We all say in sync. A loud thump sounds behind us and I sigh, "It's right behind us isn't it?" I ask. Gobber turns around and I slowly do the same and stare at the huge dragon covered in bones. It's stretches out its wings and lifts it's head a squeak coming from it's mouth instead of the flesh melting one Fishlegs had promised.

"RUN!" Gobber yells. I jump to my foot and peg leg and race across the dirt dodging a wave of fire sent at us, "Okay Gobber! We believe you!" Asher shouts.

A blast of wind shoots me and everyone else forward next to Fishlegs. The ribcage falls over us and I jump and Gobber looks up."Phil!" He yells angrily.

The Boneknapper races forward and I gasp and draw back with everyone else. The dragon opens it's mouth and I jump to my foot and spread my hands out creating an ice barrier from the looks at the ice and the fire spilling onto it.

"Find a happy place, find a happy place." She chants. The Boneknapper jumps onto the ribcage and I pull my hands down the ice wall falling with my fingers. I stare up at the Boneknapper as it hops from the top of the bone and onto the ground and I stare at it my eyes widening as I stare at the hole in it's armor.

"Wait, it searches for the perfect bone to build it's coat of armor."

I stare at Gobber who is shouting taunts at it and look at him belt buckle and then back up at the Boneknapper, the hole matching the T of Gobber's belt, "The treasure!" I shout and look at them,"Gobber! Take off your pants!" I yell. All the teens jerk their heads toward me.

"NO!" They shout.

I race over to them, "Wait! Listen to me. I think Fishlegs was right." I say and lift a hand up to my throat, "The Boneknapper is supposed to have a roar, but maybe he can't because the bone he needs is your belt buckle." I say and look at Gobber as the Boneknapper rips a bone from the ribcage.

"Gobber! Please you have to give it back." Asher pleads.

Gobber shakes his head, "No it's mine." He says the Boneknapper reaches through the newly crafted hole and grabs Gobber's peg leg. "Oh no." Gobber says. It lifts him into the air and swings him back and forth several times.

"Give him back his bone!" I yell. Snotlout and Fishlegs race up behind me.

"NOOOOOO!" Gobber shouts.

I lift up my arms, "GIVE HIM BACK HIS BONE!" I yell and the Boneknapper tosses Gobber. Gobber flings the bone through the air and it lands in the missing part and the Boneknapper rocks back and forth a few times. Gobber lands in a pile of bones next to him and I grab the edge of a ribcage bone ready to jump out and save Gobber.

The Boneknapper leans down and roars. I cover my ears and bite my lip from the stinging pain the roar leaves in my ears. The Boneknapper leans forward and I jump forward, "Gobber!" I yell. Asher grabs my arm and pulls me back and his grip doesn't loosen Gobber stares at the Boneknapper.

"Alright, you got me. Make it quick." He commands. I struggle in Asher's grip and the Boneknapper leans over and rubs its jaw on Gobber's arm. I stop struggling and let out a breath of relief. Gobber's pants fly south and I jerk my head to the side and stare at the ground as Gobber grabs his pants with one hand his prosthetic rubbing along the Boneknapper's jaw. I shiver and look at Asher.

"That's going to haunt my nightmares." I promise. He grins and looks at the Boneknapper and Gobber.

"Well at least we have a ride home." He says.

….

Much later on the back of the Boneknapper I grip the bones tighter as Asher lifts his hands into the air happily.

"You know what? I never doubted him I was always like: He's right." I hear Snotlout say. I roll my eyes and lift up a hand and snap my fingers. Snotlout gives a cry of surprise from the snow dropped on her and I hear Tuffnut yell out: "OW! This tailbone is hurting my tailbone!"

The Boneknapper roars and I grin and lean over looking at Gobber, "He sure seems happy to have his roar back." I say.

"Well legend says that the Boneknapper's roar is it's mating call." Fishlegs says.

Gobber looks back at her, "Oh! That's just a myth!" He says and waves his hand. I snap my head up as I see several Boneknapper's fly next to us. Gobber chuckles.

"Well you think Stoick will believe me now, eh?" He asks. I sigh and roll my eyes, "Yeah. I think you got him. " I promise, and look back at the Boneknappers and add, "All of them."

* * *

 **A/N** : **This has actually been sitting complete on my Docs sense mid may I think... I considered having Gobber's dragon he a Boneknapper, and did at one point in time have this posted in RTTE, but then season 3 came out...and..Grump is important. :) so Yay.**

 **Please review!**


End file.
